Archive for September 5, 2007

rule #9

September 18, 2007 super-important rules

make it a point to exit your vehicle as little as possible. aside from the necessary places such as work (blech) and home, one should try and exist for the most part inside of a car. this is pretty easy to do in l.a., and absolutely beneficial. my zeal over this new manifestation of my laziness has already resulted in me quitting smoking (two days so far!) because i can’t be bothered to stop and buy cigarettes. i can see this working as an advantage in my diet as well, barring drive-thru windows. the weekend before last, my poor car timothee got broken into across the street from akbar because the dirty thieving bastards spied my friend’s purse in the front passenger area. those jerks didn’t touch a single thing in my car except for the purse and my FAVORITE vintage jacket. this sucks on so many levels. if my friend and i hadn’t been drinking heavily, maybe she would have thought better than to leave her purse in plain view, but on the other side of the coin, had we simply been drinking IN THE CAR, no ill would have befallen us likewise.

damn damn damn.

timothee is fixed, but my heart isn’t. i miss my jacket.

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notes on the fall

September 18, 2007 clothes & fashion, lists, me news, work

as you probably know, my lack of blog entries lately and the fact that i have pretty much fallen off the face of the earth is due to a plethora of preoccupations you could care less about. given that you somehow knew that, i am going to assume that you are a regular Failure Princess reader and are fully aware that i am going to tell you what some of them are anyway.

1) things at work have been pretty darn sweet. the girl who was pretty much my supervisor/buffer between me and the boss/officemate/hardworking, competant, goodtime gal completely walked out a few Officehandweeks ago with no notice after two years of working there. this was directly following an incident in which our boss screamed at her. as you can imagine, this has done wonders for morale around the office and for my stress levels. it’s not so much that a bunch of extra work is falling onto me, but that there are suddenly new people in the office that i have to train and talk to all the time when i barely have all my training done and hate talking to people at work. the good that has come out of this is that for some reason our boss decided to finally spring for real office chairs (with wheels and adjustable arm rests!) and new mouse pads (with gel wrist cushions and a leather-like covering. i feel like a princess!) i dunno guys, what’s next, electric staplers??? if that really happens i might just have to start paying HIM. oh man.

2) it’s true, i have fallen in love. i have been “subtly” suggesting that in my most recent entries, so i won’t mention much about it again, but let me just say that it is doing crazy things to my brain. i have come down with a gnarly case of what i can only describe as baby fever. Bananakidthat’s RIGHT, you heard it here first. the only reason i can be so calm about it now is because everyone i have talked to about it has said it’s a being in a new relationship/being in my mid-late 20s thing and it will go away soon. i sure as shit hope so because this is getting disturbing. today i was waking by the park and some parents were putting their screaming, crying five year-old in the car and a looked over and involuntarily said “aw, poor little tired guy.” WTFFFFF???? intellectually, i realize that there is no excuse for that kind of public outburst and that kid should be ashamed for allowing his weakness to show, but in that moment i just wanted to hug him. hellllp meeeeee.

3) fall is fast approaching. look, i don’t care what anyone says, we TOTALLY have seasons in l.a. in a few days, the glorious autumnal glow will be upon us, and i for one am excited. maybe the leaves don’t set the sky and streets ablaze with color, but the air turns crisp and you can just feel it and smell it and i love it. first there is back to school shopping. i plan to partake in that, despite my lack of interest in furthering my education. i looove school supplies. bring on the economy packs of pens and composition books, oh hell yes! also in fall is my favorite holiday, halloween, which i also sometimes like to call “drinking christmas” because christmas is my other favorite holiday, but i don’t get to get drunk on christmas. i still haven’t thought up my costume, though, and that is a real bummer. usually i am on that shit by about july. anyways, i’m pretty into fall fashion as well. i love how every year they come out with “new” fall fashions but really they are recycled menswear looks and ripoffs of my catholic high school uniform. OMG, Uglyhmshoesi saw these hideous shoes at h&m a few weeks ago and got mega-depressed because a) ugly makes me sad, b) the 90s are officially back, and c) europe clearly hates us. why else would they sell these shoes this close to the streets of pasadena, where they could so easily fall into the wrong hands and hurt someone (my eyes). maybe some hot, finnish supermodel with pink, pillowy lips and four-foot legs wearing a silver pinafore could pull this off, but i can guarantee you there is not one single person who fits that description in the san gabriel valley or surrounding areas. geez! i’m sticking to my usual autumn essentials: tights under everything, colorful, often ironic sweaters, and classic early-mid 80s boots. i am toying with the idea of accepting the 90s revival and rocking the ripped tights, but i am afraid this might remind me too much of high school and i might start writing in my journal with my own blood again, so i dunno about that one.

well, folks, it’s late, and this has taken me entirely too long to write. i am creaky and out of practice. i wish i could find a job where i could just sit and write all day and when i’m not writing i could be thinking about writing or sex. instead, today at work i had no time to daydream so i frantically made UPS labels all the while consuming at least 10 halloween oreo cookies, which feature orange-colored cream filling and four fun halloween designs right on the cookie. what have i become? i am my own worst enemy. it’s okay though, because this has been one of the best/most interesting years of my life and i plan on ending it on a good note, at least to the best of my abilities. i am formulating a plan. diet and otherwise. starting with tomorrow, as i am getting a pedicure after work to remind myself how great it is that i can still see my feet. hopefully that will light a fire under my ass.

until next time….

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kissy, pissy

September 5, 2007 me news

it is actually pretty ridiculous how quickly the mantle of love has fooled me into thinking i don’t need to try and look cute anymore. hahaha. i have only been seeing j for ONE MONTH! poor thing. i am already too lazy to wear makeup (and it melts off in this heat anyway), buy new clothes, wear any shoes other than black flip flops or vans, or do anything to my hair other than put it in a ponytail. j says j likes that i am so comfortable and that i am beautiful both ways, but i don’t buy it. i’m gonna shape up quick. i want to be the hot (future) girlfriend. i have so much to write about j, my relationship with j, and my feelings about the whole thing, but i feel like i have to treat the situation so delicately. i feel so lucky and so scared at the same time. i am terrified of the feeling i have in the morning when i wake up next to j. the feeling that the patch of soft, fragrant skin of j’s back peeking out from beneath the covers could be mine to kiss every morning for a very long time and that i could wake up this happy again and again scares me just as much, if not more, than the knowledge that i could fuck it up at any second, ruin it as i do almost everything i touch.

Nars_babe_2 in other, less nauseating news, i have actually just about finished an entire tube of lipgloss in the first time probably EVER! the lucky lippie is NARS babe lipgloss, which is a super-shiny, sheer, bright, true warm red. it is also super-sticky, which means it is shinier and lasts longer, but also that if you aren’t careful to forcibly remove the cigarette you are smoking from your mouth, it will stick to your lips, thereby causing you to nearly drop it onto your lap or car. true story. more than once. DOH!

i wrote a big, long post about work before and this touching story that made me cry of an 88 year-old woman coming out as a lesbian, but then safari froze and i am too pissed off to write it again.

ugh.

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